Carlos Alazraqui

Tuesday Morning Stream O ‘ Thought IMAGINE this. A “love fascism” where people can wear what they want and love who they want and John Lennon’s song is pumped through speakers at schools and at work everyday instead of children dutifully reciting words to a premise...

So here we are again on a cold Wednesday morning, and I have to remember to report to animal control a nearby neighbor who has left their dog to sleep outside in 38 degree (or less) weather all night. Yet another reason I feel world peace is untenable. “Good mornings”...

6:39 and twenty one minutes before I take off for “Coffee With Carlos” on Stephanie Miller this AM. Too busy with kids and too despondent to check in on politics as I can see wisps of the earth falling off like glitter on a cheaply made toy. Intermittent sleep allowed...

Dogs walked, fed, fruit shake ingredients standing at the ready when the second daughter officially awakens. I don’t want to be the cause, or rather, the blender. Odd how the blender used to be the bane of my stand up comedy existence in badly set up clubs where the...

6:24AM: Two green apple slices, one half banana and a slice of really seedy, grainy bread with peanut butter, week old “fresh squeezed” orange juice from the oranges in the back, and I begin on phase two of the day. Dogs walked and fed, ten minute, stream o’...

Inside The Admiral’s Club near gate 43 at LAX and chatting with a gentleman who just flew into LAX from North Carolina to reach his million mile plateau. Priority for life and he is feeling it. Just an hour ago I was sitting on the couch with my wife and two girls,...

It’s 6:45 on my “toughest” morning – Wednesday AM! The dog alarm went off and got me out of bed, dressed and out the door with the two dogs, around the block, back in, get them some food and water, make myself a quick breakfast and sit down at my lap top to squirt out...